Les Miserables

I haven't been to see Les Mis yet. I cried my way through a production on my first trip to London, then scampered out as fast as I could through the curtain calls, frantically searching for a tube station that would take me to (is it Liverpool Street Station, I've forgotten now?) so that I could take the last (11pm) train to Stanstead. Jumped on the train with less than 5 minutes to spare. Who knows what would have happened had I missed it. Attempted to stay up, but ended up curled up in a corner fast asleep on the freezing cold floor in the early hours of the morning, my head resting on my backpack.

Bert and I celebrated our birthdays a couple of years later by eating pizza in a Leicester Square restaurant, then crying our way through another production. I can't remember whether I saw one or two productions in Toowoomba over the years and I also read the book (I have to admit I skimmed through some of the boring bits).

The reason I haven't seen the movie yet is that I'm not sure that I can handle such an intense emotional experience at this point in my life. Movies expose the realness of life more intensely than stage productions, and this story is very real. I've also heard that some of the singing is less than adequate and I know this would iritate me somewhat.

You see, before Susan Boyle and Anne Hathaway there was me. Seventeen years old, just started singing lessons and singing at the Empire Theatre for the first time. Unfortunately my greatness was not recognized. Another Fantine came third. But there I was, dressed in my own interpretation of Fantine, which I felt to be emotionally evocative even though it was historically inaccurate. I remembered feeling stupid because I asked the accompanist whether I'd be able to hear the piano on stage (silly question, but due to nerves), then I wandered on in an ugly brown dress with bare feet and free flowing hair.

The lights were off so I couldn't see the audience but I knew my parents, sisters and three best friends were there. The spotlights on the sides of the stage were shining in my eyes. Incredible. I count this as one of the top 5 most impactful moments of my life. Nothing could stop me from wanting to perform from then on.

Other performances have been better, but this will live in my memory. Fantines will come and go, but I will always remember a time when 'I was young and unafraid, when dreams were made and used and wasted, there was no ransom to be paid, no song unsung, no wine untasted'. I'm sure I'll see the movie one day, when I finally make up my mind.